Share your Autism story

4/13/2017 8 Comments

What is your STORY?

To be a person is to have a story to tell. — Isak Dinesen

Have you ever had "one of those years"? Where you can't wait for New Year's Eve and the next year to begin, but its only April? Well 2014 was that year for me. In January 2014 I was diagnosed with cancer. In March, my father suddenly passed away. Then in June, my daughter Grace was diagnosed with High-Functioning Autism. Talk about a triple whammy! But, by grace, faith, and the help of a supportive community, I was able to come through that tough year and now it is all apart of my story.

I am so honored to share excerpts from my story here with you. I strongly believe that sharing your story is therapeutic and may also benefit the life of another is ways you will never imagine.

In viewing our website and previous post, you are likely aware of how my "Autism Story" began. At age three and a half, my daughter Grace was diagnosed with High-Functioning Autism. For me, the diagnosis was a confirmation and brought relief as well as many unanswered questions. However, having worked with children on the Autism spectrum for many years as a speech therapist, I knew that Grace could now begin to receive the needed supports that would empower her to be her best.

Now Grace is six years old. We have had many ups and downs, like when we both cried at the first friend's birthday party that she attended. It was terribly over stimulating, yet I refused to leave thinking that things would get better. Well they didn't! But, I did learn what not to do the next time. Now, I am happy to say that Grace enjoys attending birthday parties, for the most part anyway, and now neither of us leaves in tears.

I have also enjoyed simply amazing moments with Grace. Such as riding the Sky Ride at Sea World every time we visit. So high above the water, Grace is simply in heaven. What a joy to see her face each time we enter the ride!

Are you ready to tell your story?

If so, please briefly discuss how your child was identified with Autism or some other related social challenge? How has this impacted your life and your family? Describe an "amazing moment" that you've shared with your child so far in your journey.

Or maybe you are a grandparent, aunt, or co-worker of a child or adult with Autism. Please share your story as well. How has Autism impacted your life for the better?

I look forward to reading about each of your wonderfully unique stories.

Please post your comments below and have an amazing day!

8 Comments

Khali Raymond link

11/14/2017 12:22:42 pm

Living with Asperger's is not an easy feat. It never is. imagine yourself in a room full of people. All of those people are laughing and mingling. Meanwhile, you aren’t. You’re sitting there in the corner all alone, watching everyone make nice with each other. Nobody doesn’t even acknowledge that you’re there. You just sit there, crushed from the inside. You have trouble expressing yourself because you don’t know how to. Your fear of being rejected eats you up. Your fear or feeling inadequate to others eats you up. As you’re living with this disorder, those whom you’re around can’t understand your pain. You’re constantly feeling glum and angry. You feel as if this condition drags you into an abyss, an abyss that leads you to a point of no return.

I have this feeling. Growing up, I could never fit in with others. As a kid, I couldn’t look an adult in the eye. I never had the capacity to. There was just something about looking at another person that made me feel very uncomfortable. In social situations, my heart would pound very fast. I would tend to get nervous. I would always be the one that got left out because I couldn’t relate to the other children. Being bullied didn’t help curb my condition, it only worsened it. Every day, I would walk around and get laughed at. I would be humiliated every day. I would be made fun of because of the way I talked, walked, and looked. Imagine trying to answer a question in class and the kids would mock you. Every word you would say, they’d make this expression, trying to take the words from out of your mouth.

As I was around my family, they couldn’t relate to my condition either. I constantly sent them cries for help and they just rejected me. Nobody listened. This only made me feel even more depressed. The bullying in school got so bad that I nearly tried to kill myself at the age of eleven. I was going to leap from out of my bedroom window, but my mom stopped me in the process. I would use writing as my means to communicate. I loved to write. Whenever I was in class, I would be the first person to get up and share what I’ve written with the class. I impressed my teachers with my impeccable writing abilities. My creativity was amplified. There was nothing limiting it.

But, that didn’t mean my issues with my low self-esteem and my inability to become proactive in social situations waned. The kids would call me all sorts of demeaning names, such as retarded, stupid, and many more. I lost my father when I was just a year old, and his loss alone has had a grave impact on how I grew up. As a black man, growing up without a father—that’s not easy.

My father was a very outgoing guy. Everyone loved him. You would never be able to tell if he was sad. He was so resilient. Everyone tells me I look like him so much, but I’m his complete opposite. I’m not as outgoing as he was. I’m reclusive and shy. I don’t open up too much. These issues with bullying and my bout with Asperger’s did not cease. At the age of fourteen, I was booked into a mental hospital. They had me on medications for a while. I ceased taking them in 2013. None of that helped.

Once I got to high school, I began to give up hope. I felt like there was no haven for a guy like me. I carried all this baggage. I bared all these wounds. Nobody could understand what I had to go through. But, I didn’t stop writing. I let my talent weather the storm. I let the arts influence me. Writing was my only escape. It was the only place I could go and not be judged or harassed. Little did I know—this escape pushed me to write my first book at the age of fifteen.

On October 26th 2014, I published The Ballad of Sidney Hill. That book marked my coming of age and how much I’ve matured.
That was living proof that I wasn’t going to let a mental disorder define me. They told me that I wouldn’t be able to function once I got to high school. All these specialists who remained doubtful of my growth, because of my condition—I proved them wrong. Fast forward to now, I have written forty books. I am now attending Berkeley College in Newark, New Jersey. I have a message for you all. Never let your circumstances define who you are. You can be anything!

Crystal Y. Sanford

11/16/2017 10:22:51 pm

Khali, what a wonderful story of success against all odds. Thank you so much for sharing!

Svetlana Sonday link

4/24/2024 05:39:42 pm

I fear late baths after 4:30 p.m. I don't fear touch anymore. I am safe.

Crystal Sanford

4/30/2024 09:53:25 am

Thank you for sharing your story, Svetlana. Wishing you all the best in the chapters ahead.

Svetlana Sonday

11/19/2022 04:38:59 pm

I have autism for a fear of touch and closeness. Sorry.

Darrell David link

2/12/2023 11:08:03 pm

Great Article! Thank you for sharing this is a very informative post, and looking forward to the next upload.

Svetlana Sonday

11/21/2024 03:14:46 pm

Hi. I have developmental delays. I am nice. I am moral. I like music. Hooray!

Svetlana Sonday

11/21/2024 03:13:31 pm

Hi. My mom hates me. My dad hates me. I love music. I love puppetry. I am good. I love religion. I love Greece. Hooray!

Author

Crystal Sanford, M.Ed., M.A. CCC-SLP, ASDCS is an Educational Consultant, IEP & Autism Advocate and Speech-Language Pathologist. She is also an author, international speaker, and the host of inspiring podcasts, Thriving Special Families and Thriving Autism Families! Her passion is advocating STRONG alongside all stakeholders who support the autistic student....especially fellow parents. Crystal and her team at the Sanford Autism Advocacy Group strive to empower families, schools, and community members so that the autistic student gets the education they deserve. In her free time, Crystal enjoys reading, walking/hiking a good trail, and spending time outdoors with her husband and two children in San Diego, CA.

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